a dusty tie

i get it.

gasiu — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 08:03:39 +0000

i’m fucked.

of course you’re siding with him. of course. was that even a doubt to me? no, why would it be? it doesn’t make sense for you to side with me. it’s just really fucking lame when i tell you so I can feel better and then I feel like a hundred times worse about everything. so whatever. i’ll go hang out with some friends today, forget that yesterday even happened and we’ll both go on in our own lives.

as for you, I don’t know.

a very unhappy, pissed off and completely irritated win.

thelovebug.

gasiu — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 06:46:35 +0000

Maybe it’s just because it’s february or something, but i’ve been totally hit head on by the lovebug. I feel more attracted and obsessed by you than I ever have been before. No matter what it is, I’m being totally head-over-heels for you. Completely and totally. Absolutely.

Didn’t I just write a post about this?

They don’t know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I’ll wait for you I promise you, I will

Lucky I’m in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we’re in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

:) ‘ello friend.

gasiu — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 10:42:12 +0000

have I mentioned recently that I totally and am completely, uncontrollably, irrevocably in love with you? (twilight vocab much?)

but yeah. completely. :) not sure why I felt like saying this all of a sudden, but I do, so too bad.

loveyou, winwin.

So you want to be Bella…

gasiu — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 08:43:46 +0000

disclaimer: this isn’t meant to follow the books exactly – realize that this is a real life experiance, so no, it won’t follow the book exactly. also, if you’re here to rant about how you hate the book there’s no point. :)

So you want to be Bella… well guess what? You really, really don’t.

I used to be like any other teenage girl. I wanted to be Bella Swan, wanting an Edward of my own, someone I could always trust, always love, and be with, forever. Someone I could love, that would love me back just as much, and someone who I’d always be 100% comfortable with.

What I forgot was about Jacob.

In my story I found my Edward. He’s perfect in every way that I want him to be, and he’s wonderful for me. I love him, and I trust him limitless amounts. He’s everything I want, and everything I need. He loves me, and he’s amazingly romanic, and me, being Bella, am a hopeless romantic. If we’re following the series, let’s skip Edward leaving, and me meeting Jacob, let’s just say Jacob becomes much more apparent, and guess what happens when Jacob realizes what’s happened to his Bella? That’s right. A huge war.

And sure, I’m not talking a huge werewolf gang fight against a clan of vampires here, but you get the point. My best friend, was not one bit happy with Edward. I was stuck in the middle, while I watched Edward and Jacob fight it out. My Edward reacted just the way Edward did – calmly, reasonably, but he still wanted me for himself. Jacob on the other hand, got more and more angry with me, and I got more frustrated with him. Jacob ended up becoming really pushy on me, holding my hand and other things that I didn’t really want him to do, and yet, I still loved him like the best friend he always was. Edward was getting mad at me for feeling this way, and more mad at the way Jacob was behaving.

In the end? In the book Jacob runs away and breaks off all ties with Bella. In real life, my Jacob and I broke off our friendship. Edward was happy about his win, Jacob is completely unhappy with the result.

Jacob and I won’t ever be the same again, it’s just how things turned out. So believe me when I say you don’t want to be Bella Swan. You end up trapped between someone you love, and someone who is your best friend. You can’t really do anything to help either side, and there’s only one side happy at the end of the whole thing.

It sucks to be Bella.

december 29

gasiu — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 08:24:03 +0000

so you came over and we exchanged presents and stuff. :) you gave me a MUSHROOMY! :DD I totally LOVE him to DEATH. :P

and then I gave you a gift card.
and then another.
and another.
and enough to count to 10. :P

and we laughed. xD and then I gave you the box of aeros and you liked that too. :)

we watched kenny vs spenny where you laughed like crazy. and then kai and cleve came over and we watched quantum of solstice and played halo 3. you ended up staying for dinner. :) afterwards we played katamari. xP i walked you the bus stop and stuff.

but yeah. i love the mushroom.

photoshop&christmas. :)

gasiu — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 06:30:42 +0000

1280x800 Wallpaper

:) Photoshop and Christmas.

now for some photoshop. :)

gasiu — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 09:29:57 +0000

life’s getting me down, so what do I do? I open up photoshop. :p

1200x800 Wallpaper

lyrics from story of a girl by system of a down. :P

what’s happening? a lot of things.
you : well cant u give up being mad or whatever it is at me
me : already did.
you : but nothings happening
me : that’s not up to me.
me : you don’t have anything to say either.
you : well maybe i dont want to talk
you : im going
you : bye

like what do you want me to do? :( seriously. I can’t do anything if you’re going to be like this!

-win

sigh.

gasiu — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 04:38:32 +0000

at least she gets to call herself that.
at least she gets to.

do you know what i wouldn’t give up to be able to call myself that?

history.

gasiu — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 05:14:01 +0000

I don’t get it.

It just doesn’t make sense. All the emperors have their PingYin names, and then the english names, and then the Fitz-mando names, and all of them are mixed up and they all do the same thing and I just don’t get it.

The events don’t make sense, I don’t know why or when or what happens in anything, and it’s all just a giant mess. I don’t know who’s involved in what or anything.

I don’t understand why certain things happen, and why it happens again, or the reasons behind anything.

I’m going to fail this course. :(

I hate history.
the end.

november 19th

gasiu — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 06:42:16 +0000

bad day in a row #2.

wake up feeling crap – missed tok – goes back to sleep
wakes up at 10 – missed practicing piano
goes to school – freaking freezing
gets pa photos
redos layouts for yearbook
hangs up posters
goes to table tennis – gets made fun of. (SO WHAT IF I DON’T EFFING KNOW CHINESE!!)
late to piano
screaming in the car
“i don’t care about you”
piano lesson
yearbook redo
need new writeups
need new photos
need new layouts
need to shove cucumbers up people’s asses
screaming
more screaming
screaming yet again.